It's 2 O'Clock Somewhere

Well it has been a very uneventful week in the world of getting back into shape. Not much to report other than I can do better.

I find I'm struggling with food. This is not a new realization but one that I continue to struggle with. I could blame it on the fact that I'm a stay at home mom that gets bored and eats. Or I could blame it on the fact that by 2 pm I am starving and I eat everything I can find. I could say that stress plays a huge part in my eating habits. There are so many things I could blame my eating on. I have said this for many many years that if I didn't work out as hard as I do I would weigh 300 lbs easily. That would be double my size. I know I eat twice as much as I should. Not to mention that the "twice part" is all junk. Everyday I think, I can do better. Then the clock strikes 2 and I turn into a person who hasn't eaten in weeks. I find myself thinking about Dr. Phil. He would say, "What's your payoff?" "What do you get out of eating all that junk?" "You must get something or you wouldn't do it." I guess I do get something out of it. I get comfort. I get a feeling of satisfaction. I must be missing that in my life. How do I find that without eating it? How do I improve the way I feel? Funny thought because most people say exercise will help. Got that covered. A more restful sleep? Me. ha. That will never happen. If I can find a way to feel more powerful, satisfied and comforted I truly think I would beat these cravings. I have yet to figure out how to do that. But I'm hoping that starting to blog about it may help. It certainly can't hurt.

I haven't been able to do as much in the form of workouts as I would have liked this week. I was on my own over the weekend with a sick kid. Then my other one came home from camping and looked like he had been eaten alive. After going back and forth with the possibility of chicken poxs, it was determined that it was just a bunch of bug bites. I had him home when I am usually gliding along in the pool. So back at it tomorrow. Hopefully Dr Phil. will scream in my ear to put down that Oreo because it's just not worth it.

It's About Time

Time to test the leg. Time to test myself. Time to see how long I can handle running on it. I had only 1 hr to spare. So maximum would be 6 miles. Could I do it? Would I decide to quit, because it hurt too much? Or would I decide to quit because somewhere along the way I have seem to have lost my running endurance? I can swim 2 miles but ask me to run and I quiver at the thought.

After my kids went off to school I still chose to run on the treadmill. Safety at home. The softness of the treadmill just seems to be a smarter choice right now. I had emailed my sister in law about an hour earlier to give some advice on how to run longer while making it seem easier. Time makes it feel easier. Time will give you the strength in your legs. Time spent running faster in short runs will make the slow long runs easier. Time will make your average pace increase in speed. I have put in my time over the past 5 years. So where did it all go? 6 miles just seems like a giant feat. One I was determined to overcome.

I'm glad to say the run went great. I kept a pace of 9:40 for the first 5 miles and for the last mile I ran it in 9 minutes. Giving me 2 1/2 minutes to spare of my hour limit. I had aches in my leg the entire way. With some sharp pain around 2.5-3 miles. Then it calmed down again. Kept telling myself that the doctor said it was OK to run through the pain. Too bad my physical therapist doesn't agree.

So who do you believe? The doctor you have seen for every sport injury I have had or the physical therapist who knows me by name when I walk through the door? Doctor says do what ever you want your shin bone is fine. As long as you can tolerate it. Really? I have a high pain threshold as most women do. I can tolerate a lot. PT says hold on.....at mile 2.5-3 the pain in your leg got worse right? More like a person stabbing a fork in your shin bone with each stride. She tells me that's when I need to stop. When the ache turns to pain. If I don't this injury will linger on and on and on. I want to believe the doctor. But I think I agree with the PT. Of course this doesn't mean that I won't run through the pain once in awhile. But maybe I will only run the longer runs once a week until this goes away. I'd say that's a good compromise. Let's make everyone happy shall we?

So it's time to heal. Time to ice. Time to get smart with my running. Time to have patience as this may take awhile.

He's a Changed Man

Growing up I didn't get to spend a lot of time with my Dad. I was an only child and both my parents worked constantly to make ends meet. My father is a quiet man unless he gets to his breaking point. Then all hell lets loose. But I think I could count on one hand the times that has happened in my 38 years. So quiet he was when he was home. Usually tired from work he would sit in his chair and watch TV eventually falling asleep. I remember watching Greatest American Hero, Hulk and the Muppet show in the evenings with him. I spent more time with my Mom growing up, though it wasn't as much time as I spend with my kids due to the fact that she worked also. But she tried to be there when she could. My Dad, well he was there too, but not really checked into the family gig. Don't get me wrong my parents took great care of me and provided me with everything I would need and or wanted. Only child syndrome of being spoiled. But the family unit was never really there. I think I missed out on a lot compared to how I raise my children, but it made me who I am and I don't think I'm all that bad!

My whole point is that my father has changed. His life changed and slowly he changed. He got remarried had twin girls and was at a point in his life that he could spend more time with the kids and his family. I was 18 then and off to college. I missed that whole part yet again. I then moved to Colorado and missed out for another 2 years. I came back and life went on. He's was changing into a father I wished I had grown up with. Fast forward about 20 years and here we are today. My sisters are in college and my father is retired. I waited about 36 years for my time and now it's here.

My father watched me do what he thought at the time was nutty and possibly impossible for me to do. I ran my first marathon in 2005. My father ran a marathon with me 3 years later. We did our first sprint triathlon together. I spend all sorts of time with my father, swimming, biking and running. We analyze, compare, train and compete with each other. We support and give advice to each other. We get injured and watch the other take on the race with pride in our faces. Without trying we have found our way to a great father daughter relationship. It's one of the best things about doing all this training. I know that my Dad will be right there with me.

Thanks Dad.

Back At It

I left the doctors office today thinking, OK I guess that's good news. But I wasn't convinced. I was so afraid that he was going to say that the MRI showed nothing. You would think that would be good. But no the pain is bad enough that I know it can't be nothing. I was right.

It's not a stress fracture!!! Yeah that's the good news. Shin bone is solid and I can swim, bike and RUN as much as I want or for how long I can tolerate the pain. However, it is a stress response. Never heard of that term. Basically all my ligaments attaching to my shin bone are all inflamed. From the top all the way to my ankle. A severe case of shin splints. Or in my case shin splint. But with that I have a few tears in the lower tendons which is where I have really been complaining it hurts. The rest of the shin I haven't really noticed. So I got this injury in April and laid off for 9 weeks allowing it to heal. All I did was put it in my back pocket for it to rear it's ugly head again. I need to be aggressive to get it to heal. SO that's includes all my workouts, Physical therapy which will include exercise and ultrasonic therapy, ice and patience. Back to therapy I go.

SO the minute I left the doctor's office I headed to the gym. Did a 2000m swim and jumped on the elliptical for an hour. I obviously felt like I had something to prove. I was going to run but that is what really aggravates the leg so I'll try in the morning for a small 2-3 mile run before heading out for a long bike ride.

I feel that my setback is no longer that. I got my long awaited answer and now it's time to do something about it and get back to normal, whatever that may be. Better now to have this happen then a month or two from race day.

Itsy Bitsy Progress

It's Friday.....TGIF....Yahoo it's Friday.....Fantastic, made it to Friday, yada, yada, yada as my mother says.


So why do I feel let down? Why do I feel it's an up hill battle? Why do I feel like I'll never get there? Today I've asked myself why all day. So far I'm struggling for the answer.

I have done nothing in the form of exercise since my Monday's Mutt Club spin. Could I of continued on with my week and did the routine workouts? Yes I probably could of. But this is when it gets really tricky. Is it better to continue on and ignore the nagging pain in the leg or do I lay off and finally find out what's wrong? This pain started in April , I took off 9 weeks to let it heal. Within 10 days it's back. You have got to be kidding! I spent Tuesday getting x-rays, Thurs getting an MRI with my feet taped together and I swear there was a spider on my leg for the 40 mins I couldn't move. OK, maybe it was just a string from the towel under my knees but it felt like a spider. Now I wait until Monday morning for my answer. Why do I have a feeling that the doctor will come up with nothing? Why do I think that this goal of mine just got 10 times harder to reach?

I think I've put on about 5 lbs this week. I've eaten everything I can get my hands on. I do that all the time but mostly the training takes care of that. I have been craving carbs, comfort foods, sugar all the time. Stress, lack of sleep, hormones will do that to you. Man oh man this is getting really hard..... I made the decision today that after he tells me what's wrong on Monday or what's not wrong, I'm headed to the gym to try and heal my mental wounds. Running may be out but I can swim until the fish come home..............

Tomorrow should be an interesting day. I'm playing Sherpa. I'm not a good Sherpa. Dave is an excellent Sherpa. I would grade him an A. I however would grade myself a C. See the problem is I don't want to be a Sherpa. I want to run. I want to run the race tomorrow. I don't want to watch and cheer them on. I want to run and cheer us all on. A race I will miss due to this unknown pain in my leg. Could I run through the pain? Absolutely! I have run with pain much greater than this in a few of the marathons I have done. At mile 3 of the Myrtle Beach marathon my knee was killing me..........What I have to remember is that this 9.11km race tomorrow isn't my goal. It's the 1/2 iron man that's waiting for me. It's my first setback to getting there.........


BUT I WILL GET THERE!

Mutt Club

Let's rewind the clock and start with Friday morning. I did a 5k run on the treadmill at my usual time. Off to the gym early since my husband was working from home. I was in the pool before 8am. Side by side with my father we swam lap after lap. My total was 72 laps or 1800m. I would of kept going but had to get ready for spin class. Stumbled home and did lots of shopping during the afternoon. Ate an early dinner and off with the husband and father to a 5k race. I was running twice in one day. A first for me. Not sure what my time ended up being, nothing spectacular, I think Dave and I had a 9:15 pace or so and my father was only 20 sec behind us. But with my leg killing me and it being my 4th workout of the day I'll take it.

Sat was spent with friends at a neighborhood festival and an evening with dinner and drinks. There was no work out this day as my leg was asking me to lighten up already. But at dinner cycling was a hot topic. A few of the guys are starting to cycle and enjoying it tremendously. I sit back and wonder as they tell their stories of where they went and how far, just how serious are they? How fast do they go? Are they really riding like I do? They can't be, they don't have the quality of bike I do and they are about 15 years older than I am. It's also the whole I'm getting back into shape talk. But the way they are talking I'm feeling like just maybe they could beat me if we were racing. So as we continue to talk one of the guys mentions going to spin class again on Monday. It would be his second time there. I jumped on that as quick as I could. I volunteered my husband to go, much to his surprise and then everyone decided they would go. Monday 9am spin class, beware. This would give me a better idea of how serious they really were about cycling and could I join them some Sat for a ride and not get left behind?

Sunday was a great day spent with my parents and the kids at Brookfield Zoo. It's been about 10 years since I've been there. I always enjoy seeing the animals, but always wish they didn't have to be locked up. I didn't do any exercise again this day. Did lots of walking at the Zoo which my leg thanked me for later that night as it ached.

So the highlight of the weekend was Monday 9am. There we all were. All 7 of us on the spin bikes, back row of course, so no one can stare at your derriere. We could of been considered one big mutt. We had 2 triathletes, 2 bikers, 1 who works out on a regular basis and 2 who are totally newbies to spin. We all started and I'm proud to say we all finished. An hour later we had one who had pain in his knees, one who couldn't stand up and pedal, one who barely made it through, one who thought it was tougher than a normal endurance ride which Monday was supposed to be, one who lost his footing and one who lost his shorts and one who enjoyed every minute of the pain because we were all there together. So this was it, I was very curious to know how the two guys compared that to their weekend cycling adventures. For me this particular class was tough but nothing that I can't handle. Was similar to a ride I would do outside. For them it wasn't even close. That spin class cooked them and spit them out. That's when I knew everything they say about biking has to be put into perspective. I think they are doing great and hope they keep it up. But I now know, what they consider to be long, fast and tough is just another day for me. Another sign I'm making progress.

So now I wait........went to the doctor this morning to finally find out what's up with my leg. Putting it off for 5 months was enough for me to break down and go. X-rays show nothing but the area is painful enough to dig deeper. So I get a MRI done Thurs with results on Monday. Until then I think I'll stay away from running. Anyone up for another spin class? ;)

Is it worth it?

Pro's:

* I started to exercise once again.
* Everything seems to be falling in place with my new workout schedule.
* The swim has been the easiest thing to go back to, which is a huge surprise.
* I started weight lifting again twice a week.
* I'm taking long bike rides on the weekends with my father.
* I am eating much healthier than I was.
* I dropped 4 pounds so far, 11 more to go.
* I feel proud of myself for jumping back into the life of a triathlete.

Con's:

* My whole body is sore. Especially from the weight lifting.
* My spin classes aren't easy, not that they ever were but I'm still struggling a lot.
* I feel like my day doesn't start until 12 by the time I get home and showered.
* I don't sleep.
* Running has been the biggest challenge, again a huge surprise.
* My leg is hurting again. Same spot, same pain. 9 weeks off wasn't enough.
* Having a goal of a 1/2 iron man can sometimes be overwhelming.

So I take a look at this list and wonder is it worth it? Some days the answer is no. But those days are far and few between. I think getting past those bad days is as challenging as the next workout. Becoming an athlete is as much mental as it is physical. I never realized that until I started training for my first marathon years ago. I do consider myself an athlete, albeit a not in top form one. I have those mental battles everyday. That's when that con list rears its ugly head and starts playing with me. Like today as I spent 3 hrs working out.....6 mile run, over an hour on the elliptical and a 50 min weight class I thought about how my leg hurts, that I was still sore from Tues, that I'm tired, I wish I slept better last night...etc etc. But when I was done it was all worth it. 2000 calories burned and a stronger body and mind to show for it. That's when the pro list shows up and makes me smile. It's absolutely worth it. The pro's by far outweigh the con's. I just need to keep reminding myself of that until I cross the finish line of my first 1/2 iron man in June.